This is where I end and we begin

John and I broke up..... Yeah.....

I'm working 6 day's this week. I had the fourth of july off but got called into work because Harvey was having chest pains. Turns out he was having a heart attack. So this week on my pay check i'll have 11 hours of overtime :- ) and really even though i'm tired and only had one day off and am working 8 day's in a row and didn't even get two days off together next week can complain about 11 hours of overtime who can complain? I can be bitter but not complain :- ) Not alot is new i haven't had much time for alot. I really need to clean the house!

So the other day i was at work and i'd been thinking about a hair color change. I liked the brown but it's summer and i've never been one to not fuss with my hair and change the color alot. So since the first time since i was in Jr high i have a blonde color for my hair....

i heard blondes have more fun

And if that wasn't enough today while driving around i decided to get the tattoo that i've been wanting for a few months now. It's another flower and it's also on my back kitty corner from the other one...

Okay so here's my random update that i do every couple months, hehehe! So let's see what is new in my life...... I had my birthday (on the 3rd) so now i'm 22 and it's crazy when i think about it because it hasn't felt like it's been an entire year. I swear this past year has been one of the fastest to go by in awhile.

I'm now a manager (i know who's idea was it to make me a manager)! I was very surprised i've only worked at fred meyer for two years. I was full time and became full time after only a year and then a year later at 21 (which is young) i was promoted to a manager. I'll be making a nice 13.80 an hour plus i get five hrs of overtime a week. Even though there is more stress it's not that much diffrent from what i was doing before and now i just get paid three more dollars an hour. The only down side is that now i spend *most* of my time at work, yea 2pm-12am for five day's a week. I've also decided that if you work as a cashier you really see some fucked up shit and some real funny shit and some shit that just leave's you with your mouth hanging open and a look on your face that says "wow". I don't know if every groc store is like that but fred meyer sure is. Maybe it's because of where my store is....they bought out alot of house's to put it next to the freeway in a more residential part of town. Unfortunatly the part of town happen's to be in the crack part of town, seriously there is a crack house right down the street that's been busted on more than one occasion. So you get the cracked out people on food stamps who steal anything they can't buy with their food stamp card and then you get the richer people from the upper south hill who nit pick over the *stupidest* shit you've ever heard of. And don't get me wrong i don't have a problem with people having food stamp's me and my mom had them when i was little but some people i think abuse them or don't really deserve them when they are spending it on $20.00 steak or some shit. I had a guy once who tried to buy un-alcoholic beer.

John's been working alot. Five nights a week he work's 10:45pm-2:45am unloading and loading trucks at UPS and then on the weekend he's still working as an HP rep out at best buy plus he decided to take summer classes so on Mon and Wed he's got night class. But i do get to see him when he wake's up at 12pm untill i leave for work at 1:30. And i think i even heard him talking about picking up a third job the other day but i don't think that that will happen. He's just a little work aholic! I told him yesterday that he need's to hurry up and graduate from college so that i don't have to work anymore. Or at least so that i can only work part time three day's a week :-) wishfull thinking i know.

So anyways...yea

I love going on a mini vacation esp when it's all paid for. But alas tomorrow will be the last day and i'll have to pile everything back into lucy's trunk and make the 4 hour car ride home. We've been staying with John's sister and her hubby and new baby. Ellie is the cutest baby and she love's me to death, it's very funny. Yesterday she was fussy and wiggly and Jess couldn't seem to make her happy and the sec that she handed her to me she was happy as can be. And yesterday morning she curled up in my lap and took a nap. When John and i were sitting on the couch with her snuggled up with us it was almost like a mini happy little family. Today at around noon John and i are going to meet up with some of my old high school friends for lunch and then maybe john and i will go shopping. I wanted to go into Seattle and walk around downtown but the weather hasn't been supper nice so i don't know if that will happen. Anyways i better go like take a shower or something. Oh yea john and i broke the bed last night makin sweet sweet love, HAHA.

...

I really want to update about alot but feel like i can't because i know there are certain people that read my journal.

The last few month's have been really tough.... John and i almost (well we did and then we made up) broke up on valentines day. We've never been so close to breaking p before. Every few months we get into the same fight and then we make up. He's the only boyfriend that i've ever had and i felt like we should take a break and be single but he told me that he didn't think he could wait for me untill i decided that i could be happy with him again. I've never really been on my own i don't know what it's like to not have him around and while i think that it would be neat to experiance that at the same time when i think about him not being there and not having everything that we have together it makes me sad. There were alot of mean things said (alot on his part) that should have told me to walk away and take a break but at the same time while i did say some things as well.......So for now were getting along and we just had our 4yr. aniv on the 20th of feb
So during our fight he took the car away from me (he paid for it it was his *shrug*) and i was left to rely on him but mostly my mom for a ride to work those few days where i went and stayed with her. So i did what any big grown up girl would do, i bought my own Meet Lucy,Lucy #2. Ever since i got her i've wanted to go on a little road trip; Brit if your reading this you've turned me onto wanting to take road trips you've been through alot and your strong and still find the time to take to yourself. Anyways i've got to go make breakfast who know's when i'll update again

So it's been about forever and a day since i last updated.... i don't know why i don't do it anymore. I guess there isn't anything really that goes on in my life that is really worth it.

Got a new boss at work. I was really nervous about it at first because i heard she could be a real hard ass but it seems i'm the only one as of yet that hasn't really had a problem with her yet. I seem to be one of the only people not on her shit list. But i think that's only because she's been there a week and a 1/2 and i had four close days off together and then since she's still getting used to our store she hasn't been around. I guess she's decided to put me through PIC training, so there will be 4 managers and 3 PIC's and i will be one of those people. Harvey says if your a PIC it just means you get to do manager things and you get paid less. I'll be trained to close the store and hopefully open the store and i also hope that means i won't always be closing.

John and i are doing well he's focused on school. Taking night and day classes and then working on the weekends. Ummmmm.... I spose thats all for now

I just ate some oatmeal and one peice of toast and i feel like a cow.... that is all

It's beyond me as to why i have this Lj still. I don't really ever update and yet i get on here everyday and read about other people's lives when i don't even want to write about my own. I'm sure it has to do with the fact that other than the vacation that john and i took nothing even happens or i feel like i have nothing worth updationg about.

Work is going okay. I'm getting ready to have my 2 yr review. It's hard to believe that i've been there for 2 yrs. I job that i was only sposed to have temp untill i could find something better. Now i make 9.82 and i don't think that there is somewhere that i could make that much. If there weren't so much drama there i wouldn't dis-like it so much perhaps but i also think that there is going to be drama anywhere that you work.

Johns sister is coming on friday. I'm excited i haven't got to see her baby yet. Elle (short for elizabeth) was born in may and i've to see her. John went to seattl in Aug for 4 days but because of work i wasn't able to tag along.

I've been fighting a runny nose/sickness for that last week now and i would give anything to not be sick. It sucks waking up with a stuffed up nose every morning.

Well the Karate Kid is on so i think i'm gonna go watch it untill john gets home in an hour and a half.

So this last week john and i went on vacation to portland. I had never been there and i had alot of fun. The first night that we were there a gay guy told me that i had a pretty mouth and asked john where he got me at! We stayed in tigard which made it pretty easy for us to get to where we needed to be going. The 1st and 2nd day we just did some shopping. The 3rd day we drove up the coast and went to the tillamook factory and had some grub ice cream. Our 4th and final day we went to the zoo and the japanese gardens which is where the photos are from.

At the zoo john and i had a little to much fun taking photos with the statues...

This is the first week this summer where i've had the morning's to myself and time to spend with john....it's been nice. Next week it's going to be back to the way it's been. To my mom's at 8 and to work at 3 and then home. Thank god there are only four more weeks left untill my brothers start school. Don't get me wrong i love my brothers but its like having kids and it wear's you thin after awhile. I'll get paid to more times from my mom the rest of the summer. This week im not sposed to get paid but my mom is forwarding my 56$ to buy my ticket to desinty's child. It's there last tour and i really want to go, Hillary and joanna are going together. Then the rest of the 30$ i get next week will go to paying john back. The week after that i'll save some up for my tattoo and then the rest for the vacation John and i are taking. We're gonna go to seattle and see his new neice and then maybe over to the oregon coast because i've never been there and despratly want to go. We've tried to go a few times but things have come up and we've never been able to make it.....
.... breakfast is done more later

I don't know what it is but i love to take photos. It doesn't really matter to me if people enjoy them because no one has ever commented on them but that doesn't matter. I feel a sense of satisfaction when i take a photo and print it off and hang it on the fridge. Anyways here are some photos. The first two arent that great me on my big 21 day....


Me And JoAnna


Me hug'n the toilet after the bar


Dried Roses


Dried Roses


Glass Flowers - Im a little upset this one turned out a little blurry


Stir Stix - This one could have had better color but oh well

I had the opening shift at work yesterday so i was off work by 3 o'clock and it was B-E-A-U-T-I-F-U-L!
So knowing that my cousin had the day off i gave her a jingle and by 5 o'clock with the sun still shining bright we were laying in the shade enjoying the beach...well meg was enjoying the boys and i was enjoying the beach and everything about it. After awhile meg kinda zonked out for a mini nap and i sat there and just listened to the sounds of the water and the boats and laughter in the background. *It would be nice to go back out there on a day off and take some phots.* Anyways i sat there for a long time and just thought about alot... who knew the beach could be so peacful and force you to think about so much

I know that i want to be with John and he's who i want my family with. He takes great care of me and i don't know who or where i'd be without him. But i just don't feel like the time is right for us to get married. I came home and we talked about it and he feels the same way. With having to get the basement fixed still and his being in school it's just not the right time to get married. We want to wait untill we can do everything right and can go on a honeymoon. We're on a tight budget now getting married would only make it tighter. Besides right now with things the way they are i'm happy and thats all that matters. Why rush it?

When the time is right, we'll know.

My mom is moving back to spokane today. I'm excited. I'll be watching my brothers the rest of the summer for her for $90 a week. Not bad eh'
Cleaned the house today... i feel so much better when the floor is vacumed and the counters cleared and clean. Now im making pasta salad. Life is good.

Okay so i ordered the wedding invitations about...oh.... 2min ago.
Tomorrow john has the morning off and so we're going to go and look at wedding bands. I plan on buying johns ring tomorrow since he'll be with me and i'll beable to get the correct size for him that way i won't have to pay x-tra to get the ring sized later. The weather hasn't been nice at all this month. I really hope that the weather will be nice in August. My mom is moving here next week and we'll be going to look at wedding dresses.

I like this wedding ring... keep dream'n right....it even comes with the band for 350 thats not bad

http://www.schubach.com/cgi-bin/JSJstore.cgi?user_action=detail&catalogno=1184M

So my 21st birthday was a blast. I had about 14 drinks in all, danced, laughed and had a grand ol' time followed by alot of puking. I puked on the sidewalk, on a building and on the side of the car out the window on the way home and then about an hour after we got home. But you know i had alot of fun and thats what a 21 run is all about.

After a long talk john and i have decided to get married. Im sooo excited and i can't wait. We haven't set a date yet but we know it'll be sometime this August, I think the 2nd week on the 13th. In about a year and a 1/2 i think we're going to start trying for a baby.When he's done with school and has a teaching job.

This here so far is my fav dress that i've found...
http://www.bridalmartsuperstore.com/2074.html


It's $249